A friend of mine recently showed me the importance of change. No, not the empty promised change of political slogans, or even the major life-altering kind that comes whether we want it to or not. I'm taking pennies. Nickels. Dimes.
Last summer when I was a waitress I made oodles of the stuff. I had so much change I filled four large Arizona tea bottles with it that I had to lug home in a cardboard box, and later all that change became a blessing when my savings account emptied out and I needed some cash for detergent and groceries. Yes, it's embarrassing to have a line of people behind you covering their smiles while you pay at a self-check out with a giant Ziploc bag of nickels...but, it's also a lesson of independence. I could have borrowed money from someone or written home for a twenty, but I wanted to do it myself. And my poor planning over the year meant my resources were what they were, change. And for me, the change was enough.
This year the tips were scarce, working as a bus-girl and in fast food. Yet, even though the jars aren't full, I reach into my pocket and hear a tiny jingle and I smile. Because to me, that change represents not just the rewards of hard work, but the milestones on what has been a very long year. I used to think that for me to be happy, I had to majorly change everything about myself and my situation. It's taken twenty-odd years to realize that change is snow falling; gradual, slow, steady. Eventually the whole landscape is reborn into something new, an entire page waiting to be scribbled on. And when I look at myself and my life and what I've become and how much is still so unsure, the lyrics from a Dispatch song go through my head.
Just reach into your pocket, for some small change.
Don't stress the little things, be secure in who you are. And if you want to rearrange some things, don't try to turn life upside down all at once. Chances are, the changes were always there to begin with. You just needed to let them out.
*image by google*
*lyrics in title by Dispatch--Two Coins*
